Unique housewarming gifts (that aren't another candle)

New home, new walls, and twelve candles from twelve different friends. Every one smells of "Fig and Cashmere" and none of them will ever be lit. Be the person who brings something better.

I'm Luis. I sell art from my stall in Covent Garden, and housewarming presents are some of the most fun pieces I sell, mostly because the jokes write themselves. Here's my guide.

Why art is the perfect housewarming gift

• Blank walls are the first problem in a new home. You're solving it.
• It lasts. Unlike wine, flowers or candles, it's still there next year.
• It's personal. The right print shows you know them.
• It's easy to post. Prints travel flat and light, so you can send it straight to the new address.

House-rule prints: the housewarming classics

Every new home needs rules. These are mine.

• Please Leave by 9pm (or 7pm, for the truly committed). For hosts who love you, but not after nine.
• This Ain't the Ritz. For the guest who asks for the Wi-Fi password and a fluffy robe.
• This Ain't the Savoy. Same energy, different hotel.
• Please Don't Do Cocaine in the Bathroom. The house rule everyone quotes. The "Come Share" version is for generous hosts.

For the first-time buyers

Just got the keys? Celebrate the milestone.

The Best Is Yet to Come is basically a mortgage in five words. This Is So the Happy Place belongs by the front door. There Is No Plan is for the couple who bought a house and are making the rest up as they go. More for this crowd in art prints for your first home.

For the party house

Press for Champagne goes next to the doorbell. No Touching in the Champagne Room goes by the drinks trolley. Let's Dance goes wherever the kitchen disco happens.

For the stylish ones

• I Am Luxury or I Have Champagne Taste for the new flat with very expensive cushions.
• This Is Not a Chanel Tote for carrying the shopping from the new local.

For the people who moved out of London

Friends who swapped the city for somewhere with a garden still miss it, whatever they say. London or Nowhere is a loving dig, perfect for a new kitchen in Kent. It Is What It Is suits the friend who moved for the space and is still adjusting to the quiet. And if they're coming back to visit, a print plus a promise of a day out in Covent Garden is a lovely combination of present and plan.

Something bigger: an original

For close family, a best friend or a couple you adore, a hand-painted original makes a housewarming gift they'll keep forever. Mine are painted on antique book pages, from £55. Or commission a piece with their new address, their street name or a phrase only they'll understand. Have a look at commissions.

How to give it

1. Frame it or don't. Unframed is fine: new homeowners often like to choose frames to match. A framing voucher is a nice extra. See how to frame art prints.
2. Send it to the new address. Add it at checkout. A welcome parcel on the doormat is a lovely touch.
3. Ask for gift wrap. I wrap by hand on request.
4. Renting? Include a pack of removable picture strips so they can hang it without losing the deposit. My guide: how to hang art without damaging walls.

Housewarming budget guide

UK delivery is £1.75 a print and free over £80, so a few friends going in together on a pair of prints works out nicely.

A note on rude prints

The ruder house rules are hilarious, but think about who lives there. Kids, in-laws and landlords who visit might change your choice. The clean jokes are just as funny, and you can always save the swearing for their birthday. See funny art prints UK for both ends of the scale. Housewarming in December? Browse the Christmas gifts collection too.

Housewarming gift questions